2009-09-14 10:27:00
Brain and Body Cleanse - Complete Abstinence - Month 5 - Check
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Completed month number 5 of abstinence from alcohol, smoke, caffeine and all other mood altering substances. After 16 years of abuse.
Healing is difficult.
I seem to be closing in. Like a turtle. Hiding out in the shell. Repairing and regenerating.
I am letting go. Freeing non-vital attachments that drain energy. It hurts. It is necessary. It breaks my heart.
The brain is letting its guard down. I figure it is more trusting now. It isn't getting bombarded. It is opening up. In waves. Slowly.
At night the brain is wide open and in overdrive. Dreams are crystal, vivid and intense. It is exhausting. I set aside a good amount of nap time during the day to make up.
All the things I pushed aside over the years are coming back to me now. All in the same time. Its a rollercoaster. Its detox 101.
It is interesting going to sleep. In complete silence. At peace. Knowing that I am in for a ride as soon as I doze off.
All is good tho. The cleanse is working. It will take time. I prefer to deal with this right now.
It is interesting too. Chasing demons out of the body.
As i wrote before, this cleanse takes 2 full years.
In the mean time going to lay low. Work, exercise and ponder.
All part of the process.
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